Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Randomize
