singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
