can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
