i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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