Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
