The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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