I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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