Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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