kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
