I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I wear drunk well.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
