it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
