Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You dont lie about slip and slides
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
