my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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