So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
so let's talk penis.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Randomize
