so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
