I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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