So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
