my room smells like sperm. sweet.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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