you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
