I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
