is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Randomize
