so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
