More tranny stories later!
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
