We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
