oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
