He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
