I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
