just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You have to summon your inner elephant
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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