Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Is it because I queefed?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
