i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
