is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
being pregnant is like rehab
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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