shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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