I accidentally burped into my bong.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Randomize
