Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
