i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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