I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I want a musical about memes.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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