I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
