32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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