their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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