Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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