so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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