they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
