Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
