i don't plan on having that self control this summer
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
