Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
