would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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