Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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