Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
