You smell like stripper and shame
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize
