CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
