dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
